temple diaries

by 伊凌 yi ling

Discussing the 2/28 and white terror history of Taiwan and an inevitable re-merging with mainland and our chinese future with professor nun with the lion eyes. It would seem that Taiwan has been at the flippant mercy of western utility. The southern strategy…not sure how that’s going. She mentioned how strong the women were here, and simultaneously how much weaker the men were. We discussed the lack of focus of Taiwanese, perhaps due to a history of constant colonization, a refusal to recognize our roots: indigenous/Chinese/Hakka. The lack of great masters of Buddhism of Taiwanese heritage–everyone that became notable was a Chinese refugee. Perhaps an internalized idea that Taiwanese are good for laboring and perhaps this translates into a penchant for 培養福報 and self corralling into a more vicious form of Confucian patriarchy.

Patriarchy is no substitute for a healthy masculinity. It’s a farce. So what about the masculinity that militant Buddhist discipline requires…what could come in a compassionate inquiry in that sphere? As angry as this twins deportation has made me, one reflection I’ve discussed with two of my dearest friends has been seeing my own masculinity soften in this environment these months. That’s valuable work too. So how can I examine myself and the environment and work for interdependent improvement?